I'd like to take some time to discuss a topic near and dear to my heart: the shower beer.
Maybe you've heard of shower beers, maybe you haven't. It's not a difficult concept to understand. Basically, you drink a beer while you shower. I'd even liken it to a glass of wine during a bubble bath/long soak.
Why would you want a shower beer, you might ask. I've compiled a list of reasons to answer your question, reader.
1. It is among the best ways to unwind after a long day.
2. It's a great way to recover from an exhausting activity; such as yard work, roller derby practice, or disposing of a body.
3. It feels like a big EFF YOU to society.
4. Peeing while drinking a beer in the shower IS the American Dream, I've decided.
5. It's the ultimate in multitasking, furthering you on the path to drunkenness and cleanliness. And drunkenness is next to Godliness, right? I need another beer.
6. Hell, it's the only way I want an ice cold beer in the dead of Winter.
So now that you've decided that having a shower beer is the thing to do (I mean, ALL the cool kids are doing it), you have to decide what kind of beer you'll enjoy in your shower.
I favour something cheap and domestic, usually. If you know me well, you'll know I'll try to keep my fridge stocked with some craft beers to enjoy as well as some cheap beers to get you there. My domestic of choice is, of course, PBR. So that's usually what I choose for my shower beer. I figure it's possible that it could get water or suds in it, so there's no use in diluting or 'seasoning' something that cost more than a dollar. HOWEVER I can see merit in choosing a craft beer that you'd like to enjoy. That would make the whole experience classier, because you're savouring your beer.
Did you hear that?
That was the sound of me finishing my beer.
It seems it's time for another.
So this is Rita, signing off.
Good night and happy drinking!
Thursday, May 21, 2015
Beereviews Glossary
For our viewers at home, we'd like to define some terms that we use in our Beereviews series. Some of these are true to meaning beer terms, some are bastardised definitions of such terms, and some are just things we sort of cobbled together.
This list is a growing record, so if you hear something that strikes you as unfamiliar, let us know!
Lightning Round- The final part of our standard episodes. We put time on the clock and drink a mass market beer, saying everything that comes to mind.
Craft- Any beer that is not a mass market domestic or import.
ABV- Alcohol By Volume, a measurement of how much alcohol is present in a drink. It is defined by the amount of ethanol in 20mL of a solution. This is not the same as alcohol by weight or ABW.
ABW- Alcohol by weight, another measurement of alcohol in a beverage. But this time, it's the percentage of the total mass.
Mouthfeel- The sensation that a beer gives to your mouth/tongue. Some have a glycerin-like texture, fully coating the mouth.
Floral- A description given to hop-heavy beers. It can literally taste like biting a flower. Often hints of pine flavour also pervade. See also: hoppy
Hoppy- A description given to hop-heavy beers. The processes used to make pale ales and IPAs often rely on more hops or the beers being exposed to hops for longer meaning that the flavour is decidedly more prominent. It often lingers in the mouth.
IBUs- International Bittering Units, this is a number given to a beer after its measured with a spectrophotometer and through the use of solvent extraction. This is all fancy speak, but it means that beers with higher IBUs are more bitter and those with fewer are less bitter.
Session- Session beers are those with ABVs of less than 5% that one could enjoy several of in a drinking session, such as happy hour, without getting tanked.
This list is a growing record, so if you hear something that strikes you as unfamiliar, let us know!
Lightning Round- The final part of our standard episodes. We put time on the clock and drink a mass market beer, saying everything that comes to mind.
Craft- Any beer that is not a mass market domestic or import.
ABV- Alcohol By Volume, a measurement of how much alcohol is present in a drink. It is defined by the amount of ethanol in 20mL of a solution. This is not the same as alcohol by weight or ABW.
ABW- Alcohol by weight, another measurement of alcohol in a beverage. But this time, it's the percentage of the total mass.
Mouthfeel- The sensation that a beer gives to your mouth/tongue. Some have a glycerin-like texture, fully coating the mouth.
Floral- A description given to hop-heavy beers. It can literally taste like biting a flower. Often hints of pine flavour also pervade. See also: hoppy
Hoppy- A description given to hop-heavy beers. The processes used to make pale ales and IPAs often rely on more hops or the beers being exposed to hops for longer meaning that the flavour is decidedly more prominent. It often lingers in the mouth.
IBUs- International Bittering Units, this is a number given to a beer after its measured with a spectrophotometer and through the use of solvent extraction. This is all fancy speak, but it means that beers with higher IBUs are more bitter and those with fewer are less bitter.
Session- Session beers are those with ABVs of less than 5% that one could enjoy several of in a drinking session, such as happy hour, without getting tanked.
Monday, May 11, 2015
Beer Profile: Matt
Name: Matt Stache
Age: 34
First Beer: Corona, I was on vacation with my band at the time, Anything But Stressed. We were staying at a beach house on the Gulf of Mexico. So we're sitting on the dock at the end of the day, I'd been 21 for a few weeks, and my friend Kendall insisted that I should have a beer. He offered me a Corona before realising we had no bottle opener. After running around in search of one, Kendall opened it with the top of a refrigerator-sized propane tank. It tasted just as I expected it to. I didn't manage to finish, but it was a great first exposure to beer.
Favorite Kind of Beer: Hmm...I still consider myself a mass market lager drinker, but I've begun to enjoy Pale Ales and IPAs as of late.
The Last Beer I Drank Was: Pabst Blue Ribbon
When Not Drinking Beer, I Like: A well-crafted gin and tonic. Alternatively, a nice scotch on the rocks.
Don't Hand Me a Beer That's: Been poisoned by pretentiousness, I can take care of that myself.
I'll Drink Any Beer That's: Put in front of me, regardless of whose it is.
First Beer: Corona, I was on vacation with my band at the time, Anything But Stressed. We were staying at a beach house on the Gulf of Mexico. So we're sitting on the dock at the end of the day, I'd been 21 for a few weeks, and my friend Kendall insisted that I should have a beer. He offered me a Corona before realising we had no bottle opener. After running around in search of one, Kendall opened it with the top of a refrigerator-sized propane tank. It tasted just as I expected it to. I didn't manage to finish, but it was a great first exposure to beer.
Favorite Kind of Beer: Hmm...I still consider myself a mass market lager drinker, but I've begun to enjoy Pale Ales and IPAs as of late.
The Last Beer I Drank Was: Pabst Blue Ribbon
When Not Drinking Beer, I Like: A well-crafted gin and tonic. Alternatively, a nice scotch on the rocks.
Don't Hand Me a Beer That's: Been poisoned by pretentiousness, I can take care of that myself.
I'll Drink Any Beer That's: Put in front of me, regardless of whose it is.
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